Finding The Sweet Spot
When the sky’s the limit you may never find satisfaction
All our lives we’ve been raised to become overachievers, never settling for good enough, always wanting more – better health, that next promotion, or a fancy new car. This drive pushes us to become better at what we do to accomplish things we never thought were possible. We push and push, even when things get tough because as the saying goes… no pain no gain.
I know that if things get tough, my own inner voice tells me to keep working through the pain and don’t be a quitter. After all, why settle for enough when you can have more? Contrary to what my inner voice was telling me, I was recently reminded about the simple fact that there’s a sweet spot for everything in life. This is the point after which additional investment of time, money, energy will result in diminishing returns or even negative outcomes. The key then is to consciously understand where that sweet spot is for each of us for the various aspects of our lives.
Determining your sweet spot is a highly personal matter and therefore that exact spot is different for everyone. On the surface, this sounds like a simple exercise to define but in reality we are social creatures and are influenced by friends, social media and our inherent desire to keep up with the Jones’. Depending on the subject matter it could take some deep reflection, letting go of the ego and mustering up the courage to be true to ourselves. I like the idea of having a buffer, so the sweet spot is when you have enough of something plus a little bit extra so that you feel a bit more than just satisfied.
Control our desires before they control us
The desire to want more appears in all aspects of our life. If we take the example of running, I distinctly remember after just completing a marathon many years ago, (which, by the way was not a small feat), I was immediately asked the question about whether I’d run an ultramarathon since that had become the new benchmark of physical performance. For a split second my mind contemplated this idea because naturally I wanted to prove to the world that I could do more. Fortunately I came to my senses because running 100 km would require a huge time commitment and would likely result in some serious injuries. These days, I’m happily running between 2-5 km which is my sweet spot for now – enough to get some fresh air, feel the runner’s high, not take up too much time and stay injury free.
In terms of career, everyone’s idea of the sweet spot is also drastically different. It’s very common to aspire to climb the ladder to the next level. Those who make it are praised and applauded for their superior skills and commitment to their work. Too much devotion to work however could lead to stress, burnout, and lack of balance in other parts of your life. So on the flip side, often less celebrated, are those who have the skills to advance but have set clear boundaries and have limited their own career growth to ensure that other parts of their life are not thrown out of balance. They knew what made them happy and had the courage to stand their ground.
My final example is about cars, but the thinking can apply to the purchase of any material goods. The sky’s the limit when it comes to cars, the market is filled with luxury brands, fancy trim upgrades, and features you didn’t even know you needed. It’s important to really understand your sweet spot, otherwise, you may end up over paying for something that you don’t end up using. For myself, the fancy top trim levels all look great but in reality, I’m not the type of driver that would be able to take advantage of all those features so it would be wasted on me. The sweet spot for me would be honing in on the key features that I really need plus a few extra ones to feel satiated.
Maximizing life energy
We only have so much life energy to spend, so it’s important to use it on things that really bring us the most joy. If you end up investing too much of your life energy into one area you run the risk of experiencing negative outcomes. By knowing your sweet spot you can liberate your mind to pivot and focus on another part of your life where there is still progress to be made.
Recently, with some reallocated time, I’ve started building some simple custom shelves around the house. The job was just challenging enough for my skill level, it didn’t cost a lot of money and was tremendously rewarding. The shelves are nothing fancy but they do their jobs perfectly. This is an example of an area where there’s so much more untapped potential and much more work to be done before I reach the sweet spot.